Because We All Know Tomorrow Never Comes

I’m really quite terrible at being an adult and doing things that seem like second-nature to other responsible adults. 

Things like laundry and dishes.

And vacuuming.

And showering.

I have video games to play, beer to drink, Netflix to watch and friends to high-five, all right?

It all comes down to procrastination for me.  I procrastinate doing housework and say I’ll do it later, or “Tomorrow”.

As any good procrastinator knows, eventually, all of those things you’ve been putting off build up to the point that eventually you have to spend an entire day or weekend or month or decade setting things right.

The thing about procrastination is that putting off what I need to do doesn’t actually ease the underlying anxiety (no matter how slight) I feel about needing to get it done.  This makes way for a whole new slew of negativity to wash through my brain.  Whenever I’m putting something off, the entire time I’m doing whatever I’ve decided to do instead, in the back of my mind is that angry voice saying “Hey, Stinky! You should be doing the dishes instead of killing Templars!”

The angry voice gets even worse when I realize I’ve been procrastinating doing things that propel my life closer to the “grown-up” life I want to lead.  I’m talking about things like improving my skill at piano, getting a degree, learning to balance my budget, exercising, eating healthy, taking a political stand, helping friends, building a family – I keep procrastinating doing things that can help me to further who I am and really love the life I lead.

When I procrastinate these important things, my negative self-talk gets worse and I stop believing that I am worthy of living a life I can love and be proud of.  I stop believing that everyone has the right to live a good life and I start believing that happiness just isn’t in the cards for me. 

When I’m on top of my game, I know this isn’t the case.  When I’m on top of my game, I know that I am in control of my destiny. I remember the old saying: “If you’re looking for a helping hand, take a look at the one at the end of your own arm.”  I remember that I am the one who is putting off doing things that will make me happier.

Several months ago I started a new system.  It was that every day I would do at least one thing to encourage my personal growth.  I was sitting at home, watching Netflix (Doctor Who, so really, it was kind of like I was helping my personal growth) and those negative voices in the back of my head were keeping me from enjoying David Tennant’s gangly awesomeness. 

That was when I finally figured it out: If all I do is put off doing things that are good for me, I’ll never enjoy my relaxation time.  And I really love my relaxation time.

So now, when I get home from work, I make sure that before I just settle in with a video game or a Netflix marathon that I do something that helps me to grow.  It might be something as simple as jogging in place while I watch an episode of HIMYM.  Or I might practice painting something new.  Or I might just finally breakdown and do the damn dishes. 

But by always doing at least one thing to help myself grow as a person, I’m bringing more positivity into my life and I’m enjoying my relaxation time guilt-free.

You are in control of your destiny too.  What have you been putting off that will help you feel better about the direction your life is heading?

Much love,

Annie Jay


UPDATED: Just wanted to add - the exercising in front of the TV thing came from this link.  Definitely worth checking out for some new exercises to try out in lots of different situations!