This Is Not a Real Post

Happy Wednesday, Friends!

I'm pretty sure we're all readers of The Bloggess around here.  

Here's her Mother's Day blog post.  

And here's just one perfect reason why she resonates with so many different kinds of people - 

"Celebrate the hell out of yourself.  You deserve it.  But you know who else deserves it?  ...The women who don’t want kids and have to listen to a bunch of bullshit about how you’re only worthwhile if you’ve pushed a human out of your vagina"

Thank you, Ms Lawson.  Thank you for fucking getting it.

I'm so tired of being treated like a second-class citizen because I'm 28, single, and childless.  My life has just as much meaning as the lives of the members of the cult of "mommies".  

I've said it before, it's not all mothers who treat single, childless women in this way - but to those of you who do - seriously, just stop.

The same thing goes for the cult of "my boyfriend is the best thing that ever happened to me and I will talk about nothing other than the inane things we do together and oh how I wish you could find the happiness that we have.  Yes I had to remind him to flush the toilet, and teach him how to peel an apple today, but other than that, it's just a really great relationship!"  Seriously, if that is what supposedly great relationships are supposed to be like, no thanks!

To all my single, childless friends - let's go do awesome things on our own this weekend and make all these ladies jealous of our independence!

Hugs n kisses,
Annie Jay

PS to anyone who thinks "Oh, she's just bitter and jealous".  Yeah, no.  No I'm not.  I'm not jealous that as soon as you found a sub-standard boyfriend or had a child you began to feel like you had achieved your life's goals.  I'm not willing to settle for a person who is anything less than exactly the awesomeness level that I deserve.  And even once I've found him, I have other things that will keep me pushing my life to be freaking awesome.  xoxo

Why Suffer When You Don't Have To?

I love this time of year.  The sun, the soft grass, the temperature – I pretty much become addicted to the outdoors.

Unfortunately, I have really bad allergies.  I know there are people out there who have worse allergies, but being allergic to just about everything outdoors plus dogs, cats, dust and mold…well… let’s just say, allergies are a major part of my life.  Even as I type this I can hear a wheeze in my chest and my eyes are itching like crazy.  I was first diagnosed with allergies when I was around 12 years old and have been learning how to handle them ever since.

I never used to be very good at maintaining my allergies; I’d sleep next to an open window; I would ignore chores like dusting and vacuuming; I’d go ATVing on dusty trails; and I’d play outside all day and go to bed without showering the pollen off.  Hell, I’d even forget to take my daily allergy medicine and would let myself suffer instead.  One summer I got pink eye at least 10 times. (If you ever take your eyes for granted, a summer like that one will really really make you value them!)

After 16 years, I’ve finally let go of the denial and have learned what to do to maintain my symptoms.  I’ve learned that I can enjoy the outdoors without getting myself super sick in the meantime by remembering a few simple things.  I religiously take my allergy medicine; keep my windows closed on high pollen days; wear sunglasses to avoid getting allergens in my eyes; avoid eye makeup on the really bad days; and I change my clothes or shower as soon as possible after a day outside. 

Sometimes you have to put in a little extra
effort to be where you want to be.

Remembering to do these very simple things has allowed me to enjoy my love for nature but not have to pay for it the next day. Sure, sometimes it’s a pain in the neck to have to fit a shower into my evening routine (naturally curly hair does not ever look good when it’s been slept on, least of all if it’s been slept on when wet) or to dust and vacuum every other day – but I know the work is worth it in the long run.

Because I have become proactive, my misery has eased.

The same principle can be applied to living a contented life. 

I can choose to sit back and complain about what’s wrong, or I can take steps to actively improve my outlook.

If you aren’t happy, take some time today to really think about why.  Is the problem something that you can fix? If you can fix it, what do you need to do?  If you can’t fix the problem, can you find a way to live with it and change the way you react to or think about the problem?  If you can’t find a way to live with it, then there is a way to fix it, you will probably just have to look a little harder. 

Nothing in your life is completely outside of your control.  Do research.  Make a plan.  Set a goal. 

Most importantly – Take action!

As I’ve said in the past, sometimes I really suck at being an adult, so I know some things are going to be difficult.  If you need support, I’m here for you and would be happy to listen or give you a boost up.  We’re all living the same life in different ways; we can help each other to live better.

Today, I love you.  Today, I know you are capable of working for a life without misery.

Hugs n kisses,

Annie Jay